Wow, how did I forget the ever-waging battle

So, I went back to school today after a break- 17 days to be exact (1). I forgot that teaching, at least from my point of view, is sort of a battle. You are constantly fighting to get the kids to want to learn.  My kids had a one week jump on me, so right now not wanting to learn had the upper hand.

Let me first clarify my battle, I am not fighting the students. My kids are not the problem- it is ALL OF THE THINGS AROUND THEM that are the problem: what they eat, who the talk to, who they do or (mainly) do not go home to, what the media tells them; years of education missing because of illness, self-selection and no guidance, having to get hair done, and a myriad list of other woes that I will not relate here. (run on sentence purposefully placed for effect to convey the exhaustion it brings me to even think about this issue.)

Anyway, I go to work today. My 1st period regaled me with tales of how they HAVE NOT DONE A THING FOR THE LAST WEEK- I am not shocked, I know this is the way it works, I just thought I was going to go in there and teach, and that is not at all what happened.

The first warning should have been when they called my cell last week during class, from my class room, while presumably they should be doing one of the super-fun differentiated (did i mention fun?) activities I have constructed for this, or similar, emergency. One of my more colorful students called, she wanted me to know they 'were not doing shit'. She wanted to know if I had 'that swine'. Everyone was yelling.  I was touched that they cared about me but this was just a battle in the war. The warm fuzzies and drugs distracted me from the battle.  Not that I could have done much, but I could have been ready...... waiting..... TEACHING! (Tonight we dine in hell, for today we teach to the death.)

I walked into the room and it was spookily clean.... never the case when you have a sub. I started looking around and noticed a lot of student work and posters missing. I mainly noticed because I could again see the graffiti that I was covering them with. (F**** Mr. So-and-so 2001) etc. Then, I looked at my bookshelves, they were half empty (except for an un-used condom- this time though, still in the wrapper! Win!). I have spent a lot of time filling those shelves, I start to feel self-pity. But I stop. I just hope the books found a good home. None of this made me mad yet, we were still in the win, then I went to my desk.

I opened my drawer. One of the subs kept food in my desk and left it. Some sort of cookie concoction. I am allergic to wheat and I know better- it bring the critters. Mouse poop everywhere. Receipts for materials, pictures even half-eaten. And the bike lock on my locked cupboard was jacked, nothing missing, but again, she must have put her lunch in there. poop city. It is all over my IEP's. my beautiful, organized, tabbed, IEP's.

Violate my room, write terrible things on my wall. Don't eff with my IEP's. Just don't. Earlier this year, one of my windows broke over a weekend, and rain got in and ruined them, now this. It is just not a good year to keep paperwork straight. I look down, with twanging lip...

OH, I see- other adults- you came to do battle with me, I see you, I see what you are doing there. Trying to prevent me from being the positive good teacher that I am to prevent my kids from wanting to learn. It is cool, you fought a good fight, but you didn't get me! I sprayed those binders off with some lysol and put tape over the do-do marks and just kept trucking. Eat chalk dust and mouse dander, suckers.

Hell.... The kids didn't even steal all my markers and glue.  I guess, I still might have a win. At least of the hearts. I just now need to get the minds.... so much harder.

(1) as a co-worker creepily informed me, he was like, "I sat there one day and counted one day last week, you got a 17 day break..."

(2) Attribution to Tonya- thanks for this hysterical you tube link; there are many more near it, specifically about collaborative planning, that are poop-your-pants funny.

Why now, after all of this time?

That is the question I am asking myself.

Well, there are several reasons. I just found out that the blog that brought me here to teacher  Epiphany In Baltimore is up and running again and for some reason that inspired me to post. Plus, I was chatting with a friend who is also a blogger of note (The Smallest Twine). Also, I feel like I now may have something to say that isn't just glib and funny. I am probably winning more at living now than I have at any point in recent memory, and I just want to keep that going by reflection.... and junk.

When I was deciding to be a teacher, I spent hours analyzing every single piece of information about Baltimore and teaching and teaching in Baltimore, to the point of minor obsession and much hand wringing and sighing did occur. I read the city schools site, the Sun, inside ed, etc. The most valuable thing I found was this blog called Epiphany in Baltimore- it was witty, insightful and I really think it was the whipped cream for the decision to move here. (plus, he was a dude from MI... it doesn't hurt).

SO, three years on, and a lot of hysterical, sad and interesting stories later, here I am.... willing to share. (I mean, who doesn't love to hear about random bull crap from my life? And now you don't even have to call me! or facebook stalk me for minor details!)

Right now, I am sitting on a couch doing this while I should probably be planning, but next week is a weird week (HSA and Final) So...... really,  I have a few days done so I am going to do this instead... that being said, I am looking up resources for teaching Antigone.